Dyson makes for a confused monkey

So I have one of those nifty Dyson handhelds, because my dogs' fur loves the couch like a cheap whore. After a muddy pawprint left me scrambling to find said handheld, alas it was out of juice. A couple of chained surge protectors later and I could reach the couch with the handheld and be plugged in with little fear of electrocution.

Pressed the trigger and... nada. No sucking, no disappearing mud, nothing. The f***ing thing doesn't work when IT'S PLUGGED IN! What electronic device doesn't work when it's plugged in? Maybe an electromagnetic pulse generator after it's detonated, but holy crap... really? Fortunately, the wife is not averse to manual labor and simply scrubbed off the mud with a damp towel but honestly, that defeats the purpose of having a ***d*** Dyson!

Conclusion: Brain fart... serious, serious brain fart. I'm applauding... without... any... sarcasm...